Breaking & Building Habits

Have you ever noticed how when you are on vacation or out of town you may seem like you are in a funk? Things are out of whack? Things that are old-hat habit when you are home, you forget to do or take care of when you are away? This could be anything. Forgetting to brush your teeth before going to bed. Forgetting to wash your face. Or even changing your routine and drink coffee before you workout or shower (or whatever your ritual is.)

If you’re like me at all, just being away from home can cause you to forget all the habits you have so successfully built while you were at home and in familiar territory.

But it doesn’t have to be that way. If you are mindful about the habits you want to keep, you can reinforce those – by ensuring that you do them – and you will be able to do them anywhere you you without fail.

Use Forgetfulness To Your Advantage

But what I want you to understand is that this same forgetfulness can be to your advantage when it comes to giving up habits and actions you no longer want.

As an example, I used to have a habit of stopping at this little convenience store mid-point on my way home and getting something to drink. Within just a few days, I found myself looking forward to the stop. That little pit-stop became the treat for having worked all day, done a good job, put up with my coworkers, whatever. =) It wasn’t JUST the drink. The whole ritual involved the road I drove on, where I worked, etc. When I changed one part of the ritual (the road I drove on) the habit sorta broke. And that gave me the space to create new habits.

This goes for ANYTHING.

If the first thing you do when you come home is raid the refrigerator, see if you can change your routine to help you break that habit. Come home, pee, then go get the mail, pick a few weeds from around the mail box, then go back inside. Sort the mail. Do whatever you can to try and create that pattern interrupt that will create the space that you need to make the changes you want.

The Inverse Applies As Well

If you are struggling to do something, being away from your regular ritual habitat may help you create habits. I had a client once that could only seem to do her exercise in the morning when she was out of town on business. At home, it never seemed to happen. When we sat down and analyzed what was going on for her, it turned out that the way her habits and rituals worked at home, she hadn’t created space for the habit of a morning run. When she was out of town, many of the things she normally had to do were taken care of by her husband at home. Being out of town created space for her to do what she wanted. So, over a matter of weeks, we made minor adjustments to her schedule so she could integrate her out of town habits into her daily life. Some of those tasks hubby only did when she was out of town – well, some of those helpful chores, he got to keep. =)

So, if you are struggling to make the changes you want, consider doing or going somewhere out of the ordinary. Go to a bed and breakfast this weekend, and see if you can integrate the habit. Try taking a different route home. Try setting your alarm for 5 minutes earlier – or stop hitting the snooze. These minor adjustments can give you exactly what you need to create exactly what you want. Change.